1 year

Three hundred and sixty five. 

That is the number of days that we have been without Darin in this life. I have thought of him every single one of those days. We've gone through a year and that means that we've had our first set of holidays without him, first birthday celebrations without him… Christmas is now past, the first Christmas we had without Darin.  

That is what makes me sad, when I think about all of the things in the future that he won't be here for. That thought is very overwhelming. 

We went to Weiser for Christmas again this year. I went back and forth on the travel plans a lot, I didn't know if Weiser was the last place I wanted to be, or the only place.

I am glad that we went and spent the time surrounded by our family.

It was healing to be there and be able to celebrate together with the people who can relate the most to how I feel. 

Holidays will forever be bitter sweet for me.

We laughed and had fun. We remembered good times that we had with Darin and I know that is what he wants us to do. Darin was the definition of fun and living life to the fullest. So that is how I try to  approach my days.

"Happy. Happy. Happy!" -Darin

Living my life with smiles and joy, finding things to celebrate every day, and being grateful for all of my blessings. Especially that promised blessing of eternal families given to those who try and be a better person than they were the day before. That is what I try to do.

We made this for my parents for Christmas:

He always said that. Thanks to my little brother for reminding us that finding joy in the journey is so important! He must have taken notes from a prophet...

"In all of living, have much fun and laughter. Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured." 

-Gordon B. Hinckley 

Joy to the World

Merry Christmas!

I'm not going to try and sugar coat it… we beyond failed with Christmas pictures. It's annoying but we did have a good Christmas morning at home opening presents. We woke up to a winter wonderland outside and Clayton was so happy about that.

Half-way Decorating

I wasn't motivated to decorate for Christmas. Clayton was the push behind the "decking of the halls" this year. He was SO excited for all of the festivities that it helped us all get in the Christmas spirit! Our tree was only decorated half way down this year, Quincy was just too tempted by all the shiny ornaments!

We took the boys to see Santa at the mall and the helper elves don't let you use your own camera unless you're outside of their boundary fence thing so this is as good as it gets on an iPhone that is zoomed in kind of a lot… Clayton was excited to tell Santa about a boat he wanted for Christmas. Quincy was just tolerating it all, but he didn't cry, I was a little surprised. 

and just for the cuteness factor here are some recent pictures of our little dudes:

Giving Thanks

"The thankful heart opens our eyes to the multitude of blessings that continually surround us." 

-James E. Faust

I made a print of this quote as part of my Thanksgiving decor, it was my motto for the month.

Truth be told, I was dreading Thanksgiving this year. I was starting to get anxious the closer we got to Clayton's birthday because I knew once that was over "the holidays" would start and December would be here. December is going to be a hard month to face, however, my heart is thankful, and I am able to see the many blessings I have been given. I could count more than a million blessings that surround me, but I will list a few:

The personal relationship I have with my Savior, Jesus Christ, and the love that He has for me.

The knowledge I have that families are eternal, and the family that I get to spend forever with.

My marriage that is strong, and my husband who I love more than words can say.

The boys that I get to call my children, they mean more than the world to me.

Thanksgiving was here before we knew it! Sean's family came for a few days to spend the holiday with us. Is anyone surprised that we failed in the picture department?? I'm sure that you have come to expect that by now when it comes to family get-togethers… 

So instead I will just tell you that we had fun, dinner was pretty good, and the house didn't burn down. I would call that a success. 

We are glad that the Boggs made the annoyingly long and boring drive to spend Thanksgiving with us!

Here are the few pictures we did take:

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!!

FOUR

Today we celebrated Clayton. He is 4!! Wow. 

Clayton is independent, he tells us that he can do things by himself now because he is four. He is smart, I've been teaching him how to write the letters and he is constantly asking us questions about everything!  He remembers it all too… so watch what you tell him!

Clayton loves to sing and a lot of the time he makes up his own songs. He has a huge imagination and plays "pretend" all the time. 

The kid has the most tender heart, he is always concearned about others. He is loud, he is silly and he is full of energy. 

Clayton we are proud of you. We love that you are so helpful. You light up our home with your laughter and we are so grateful for that. We love you very much!! 

Happy Birthday Dude!

Here's the morning bed picture with a guest appearance from Bumblebee the Transformer (The present that he got from Grandma and Grandpa Self when they got here last night.)

Is anyone surprised by the party theme he picked this year?? Super Hero party time!!

 

 

 

 

 

cap gun shooter… scary face!

He got this fireman outfit from Grandma and Grandpa Boggs

Snowman Builders

We got the first snow of the year today, well actually it started snowing yesterday but this morning there was enough to build a snowman. Clayton couldn't wait to get outside and play in it. Quincy wasn't a huge fan of the white frozen stuff. 

Halloween Heroes

Happy Halloween from your neighborhood hero squad!

Once again we had the cutest costumed kids… it seems to happen every year! :)

Just look at these adorable super heroes!
We went around the block and that was enough trick-or-treating for these boys. Clayton said "Dad, can you knock on the next door? I am done." He loved handing out candy at home, that was his favorite part. Quincy had to stop after each house we went to and check his bucket to see what was new. He was excited about the candy!